Remember When You Were Young

"I remember..", Plessey began in his 'story' voice. Gorden butted in.

"I remember when I was a young buck." Cola's eyes widened, Gorden was usurping Plessey's story telling rights! Plessey smiled and let Gorden talk.

---*---

"You're doing it wrong!" A voice from below me piped up.

"Doing what wrong?" I said, indignantly looking down at a gerbil who'd just appeared from out of nowhere.

The gerbil ignored the question and started telling me what was wrong.

"You're hunched over, as if you're doing something you shouldn't. You keep looking from side to side as if you expect to be found out at any moment. Your every movement has 'guilty' written all over it."

"What makes you think I'm guilty of something?" I asked, hurt and annoyed that it was so obvious.

"You're bunking off school." The gerbil said smiling. "I can tell."

"Bu-bu-bu..." I began, but couldn't get any words out.

"It's okay," Said the gerbil. "So am I." I was shocked by his admission. He grinned a Cheshire grin and asked "Well, then, are you coming to the river to skim stones with me?"

---*---

I got into trouble that night. One of my friends had gone to my mother and asked whether I'd be back in school tomorrow. My ear hurt mightily from the pulling she gave it.

I went to school the next day. And the next.

Then that farmer caught Mum. I though I'd never cry so much.

So there was no one to pull my ear. And they though I'd have some time off school anyway.

I did go back, a couple of times after that. But not immediately.

Basically, every day I met up with David and we skimmed stones again. I remember that we tried to make a raft and failed.

No change there then.

Playing with David was always more fun than lessons. It seemed more like life than childhood.

He knew some of the weirder characters in the woods. There was this strange, one-winged raven we used to visit. We'd take him offerings of food and he'd tell us stories or chase us away. David would away run so fast when the raven did that half-fly-half-run of his. I'd never seen someone so scared of anything before.

"Why are you so scared of him?" I asked, "He's just a harmless old bird."

"Why aren't you afraid of him?" David reposted.

"I'm just not afraid." I said.

"Ah?" I could see that David was confused by this, "Why not?"

"So I don't stutter."

"'Scuse me?" The bemused gerbil required clarification.

"My mother told me.." I replied.

"Your mother told you?"

"Um," I nodded, then I stood straight and quoted my mother's words:

"Fear leads to anger.

"Anger leads to hate,

"Hate leads to stuttering."

"That's st-st-st-st-st-st-st-daft!" David rolled his eyes.

I shrugged my shoulders and smiled one of my best Hero-smiles; all teeth and sincerity, "S'what mum said."

"I'm consorting with a madman." The gerbil said quietly to himself, but I heard him. I think he used to do that sort of thing, speaking low to himself, just so as I could hear his thoughts without coming out loud and bearing his soul. He didn't really think I was mad, but he needed to tell me that he thought I was different to his other friends.

"I don't have a mother," David said in a melancholy tone, then he amended, "Well, not anymore. I had one to start with. You know. I had to have. Everyone had a Mum, right?"

I nodded. I felt a wisdom in him that I couldn't match, even if it was a cynical wisdom.

----*----

We found a slice of human bread. Horrid white, thick stuff. We decided to take it to the Raven. He'd think it was luxury. We carried it like a sheet we were about to fold.

"He'll never notice the mould." David said. "Adds a little colour 'though. Doncha think?" I shifted my grip to keep my paws away from the green dots.

"Squark!" We heard as we reached the raven's nest.

"We've brought you a present!" I shouted - I liked to give him notice of our arrival. David liked sneaking up on him, making it a game to see how close we could get before we were discovered. The closer we would get the more likely the raven was to fly off the handle and attack us rather than to talk and tell stories.

So, as I was saying, I liked to give him notice of our arrival.

"Squark! Is it my furry little friends again?"

The raven leaned over the side of his nest and looked in our direction. He didn't have to raise himself up far - his nest was a rather higgle-de-piggle-de affair with walls that resembled mad crenellations on an insane castle - high then low then lower again then higher.

"Squark!" He said as he focussed on the bread, then we could hear him clack his beak. I think that meant he was happy.

We reached his nest and, edging round to a lower-than-low spot we heaved the bread in. Before we could climb in after it we could hear him starting to eat.

"Umm! Tasty!" We heard. "Ah, look at the mould." My left paw was in mid-air as I lifter it over the low wall. The corners of my mouth turned down as I expected him get annoyed and I froze. David jumped underneath my leg and hopped into the nest. I expected to see him shoot out with the raven in pursuit. But no, the raven sounded happy.

I peered in, the raven was picking at the mould spots and eating them first! David sat on a rough seat of twigs (it was a nest after all) as far from the raven as possible. I hopped over and joined him.

"Tasty bits eh?" The raven said. "Not as tasty as gerbil eyeballs. But tasty-enough." He was smiling and so was David. I thoroughly expected the comment on eyeballs to worry David. He was laughing!

Sometimes he was brave.

No, more like there were times when he wasn't frightened and I couldn't understand why.

Pretty soon the bread looked like a flat cheese-grater and the Raven sat back, satiated.

"Want to know how I lost the wing?" He asked us head askew. We didn't respond but he assumed we did. I wasn't so sure, myself.

"I used to be an important bird you know. I was the eyes and ears of a blind human. He lived in a hut in the forest and was the only human I'd ever seen who was happy to live away from the herd.

"He lived with the forest, unlike most humans. He'd only set snares when we was hungry and never so many snare that he caught too much food. He had a small garden where he grew some vegetables. Every so often I'd catch a small rodent that was chewing on his cabbage and take it in to him. I'd wave it under his face and he'd smile. 'You have that one.' He'd say. I think he could smell the size of it.

"One winter everyone was scarce. The rodents were going around in pairs and would try to fight me off when I flew down. I started to get really hungry. The human did too and I could see him get visibly thinner. I wondered why the fool didn't just go back to his herd and live with them. I wondered why I didn't fly south for the winter with some of the other birds. They say there's good pickings in the middle of the human towns. They also have little boys with slings. And bigger boys with stones.

"My human was lying there one day. He didn't get up just groaned and rolled on the bed even though the sun was high over head. I looked down at him. And I realised he didn't need his eyeballs. Tasty things, eyeballs. He didn't need his eyeballs!

"I flew over to the head of his bed. He heard me and started chattering to me. I smiled and jerked my beak down at his face and pierced his righthand eyeball. Oh what a scream he made! I grabbed and yanked at the eyeball. It squished in my beak and I felt the juices dribble over his face. I swallowed and jabbed at the gooey substance and was having my first meal for over a week. Silly me. I forgot how big he was. He was flailing around and he grabbed at me as I pecked at him in my hunger. His hand slid from my body but he got a grip on my wing and swung me off. He kept a tight grip on my wing as he threw me from side to side. I managed to protect myself with my free wing, but he was far stronger than me and I felt a sharp hurt and I was suddenly flying through the air. If his door had have been shut I'd have hit it with enough force to kill me. As it was I flew outside and landed in the undergrowth. Pain kept my eyes and beak shut, but I attempted to fly away nonetheless.

"I could fly with my eyes shut, but I couldn't fly with only one wing. When I realised what had happened I screamed the loudest scream you would ever hear. Animals all over the forest panicked when they heard my scream. All except a hedgehog and a bat. The two stupid animals came and picked my up and bandaged me up and took me away from the human

"I was ill for weeks, but those two looked after me. The human died, so I was told. The foxes got to him first and he 'helped' them through the winter.

"When I was able to walk I hobbled to the hut and, with the help of the hedgehog, I set the place alight. I stood there and watched it burn down."

The raven noticed some mould he'd missed and attacked them with new vigor.

Unsettled by the story I nudged David. "Let's go." I whispered at him. David just stared at the bird as I stood up and backed out of the nest.

The bird looked up and fixed David with an evil stare. "Good mould, but eyeballs are much much better!"

At that David jerked to life and twisted and raced out of the nest. My nerve broke and I raced after him.

David just kept on repeating "Eyeballs. He wants my eyeballs."

That night, the raven's nest burnt down. I remember them talking about it - they said he'd panicked in the flames and knocked himself out. I think it was some hand of the gods, once he'd unburdened his soul, even just to scare a couple of kids like me and David, he'd sealed his fate.

---*---

Gorden laughed a little. Then tears came to his eyes. "Poor raven. Poor David."

---*---